Last week I went to a clinic for my first botox & fillers experience. As some of you might have seen on my latest pictures! 🙂 Actually it is an experiment for me to find out if it is something for me or not. You never know until you try. Of course my interest in trying injectables comes from my bimbofication process. Not because I thought something was wrong with my face or that I really needed the injectables. I’m just curious to see if it is something for me and if it isn’t then I’ll stop. Luckely it isn’t permanent 🙂 To be precise, botox lasts about 9 months and fillers 3 to 6 months. The effects slowly fade.
Now if I would write from the perspective of the bimbofication mindset I can say that going to the clinic was really about living the fantasy. Becoming more plastic is a huge deal when it comes tp growing into bimbofication. I told the girl from the clinic that I’m after the plastic barbie doll look. She advised me and said that cheek fillers can help create that barbie look (but that’s to write about later).
When I got in the chair I was nervous of course. We started with the botox and when she injected the botuline toxine into my forehead I felt the fluid burn in my skin. Btw, I chose Botox over Bocouture because that’s new and I prefer to use something we know more about, eventhough it costs more money. We did two zones my forehead and frown wrinkles, although I only had thin lines instead of actual wrinkles. A doll has none, nor shows much emotion so we did the botox. Now the first day I didn’t really notice much of a change, only the next day when I woke up my forehead and space between my brows felt heavier, more plastic. For two days I’ve had a light head ache because of the change and I had one tiny bruise. What I did notice and what bothers me is that the weight of the botox slightly lowers my brows. Which I knew could happen and luckely can be fixed by injecting a bit of botox under my eyebrows. It creates a tiny brow lift. I’m very happy that this is possible because now I feel like a look a bit more strict. Could be fun if I were a Mistress lol! But it’s not what I want so I’ll go fix that problem soon.
The botox works because seriously, I can’t frown and I can’t look angry (on purpose). It’s a weird feeling, a weird plastic-in my-head-feeling. Fits the fantasy, though I’m not sure if I like this enough to get it re-done when it works out.
Mostly because (here comes some important non-bimbo geek stuff) basically botuline toxin is poison found in nature that in high dose is deadly. It is a muscle paralyzing toxin that is used in a super low dose to stop the muscles in your skin from working. So it’s not like a filler. My double feeling when it comes to botuline toxine comes from when I was still working with wild birds. Some of them got diagnosed with botulism, which means that they were paralyzed by a bacterium called clostridium botulinum. This is what Botox is made from. Although botox seems to be used in a controlled way there is no cure for actual botulism which is an increasingly paralyzing and fatal disease, that causes other horrible symphoms but has no effect on conciousness or cause fever. (If I had botulism I think I would prefer loss of conciousness, it causes a horrible death that I on purpose won’t get into detail with).
So we inject a tiny bit of a deadly toxin into our skin to look plastic, that’s the short story. I’m not saying that this is all bad because honestly I don’t know. What I do know for sure is that the truth lasts longer than a fantasy. Kink is fun but you got to stay connected with reality. I’ve seen deadly sick animals (not even humans, though it is deadly for us too) die horrible deaths from having botulism, so it’s not strange for me to re-think about botox. I made this connection after I got the injectables done and it’s okay but I prefered to have heared this from my doctor before the procedure was done, so I will talk to her about this next time I see her for checks.
Then there’s the part I do like though. Ok, the lip injections didn’t burn like the botox did but it really hurts even though I had anesthetic cream on my lips for some time. It was a bit like being pierced but over and over again. So that caused a lot of endorfines to work in my brain which made me feel a bit high and dreamy. Perhaps that’s what you feel when you get a tattoo done, I don’t know for sure because I don’t have any tattoo’s.
My lips felt a bit swollen, the skin a bit tight and the fillers (hyaluronic acid) at first felt a bit stiff in my lips. During this period I’ve massaged my lips often to check if there were any lumps, if so I’ve massaged them out until my lips were smooth again. I really liked the plastic feelings of my lips during the healing period. It’s a plastic feeling I enjoy more than the plastic feeling that the botox gives me. Because it was my first time getting lip fillers we used 1.0ml. For now that seems to be enough, although we’ll check to see if both sides are as even as possible now that swelling is gone. Hyalyronic acid is found in the body itself and will be broken down by my body over time. This acid will also be injected in my cheeks to make my face more doll like. If I try all this and my checks are fine I will let my face stay like this and see if I prefer my face this way or as it used to be. It’s an experiment and not permanent. Just to see what it’s like to be a plastic bimbo barbie.
So yeah, I’m having a lot of fun trying on my lipsticks and glosses again. To feel what kissing and giving blowjobs feels like now. I wonder if it feels different for others to because for me it certainly does. Was a bit scared to work with my new lips at first. I still don’t suck hard on anything because I did one time and now I’ve got some tiny light spots on my lips so I have to be carefull with my lips and not get exited too much during the healing period.
Tomorrow I’ve got check ups. Will keep you posted!