If I pretend to be only good for one thing.. then it doesn’t hurt that people only want to use me for that one thing. I can pretend to be in control and I won’t feel like a victim ever again.

Moody Morning

This morning I have been so deeply depressed. On one hand it's like crippling, paralyzing depression. On the other hand there were all the borderline feelings, that sensitivity that makes me feel triggered almost without a reason. A glance in the wrong way, a difference in attitude, a change of plans, not noticing something or [...]

The emptiness I feel everyday made space for such deep sadness. This morning I woke up with it and it clings to me.. whatever I do. It's a nostalgic feeling. That I try to hold on to through going into little space. Which at times is a relieve but at the same time it hurts [...]